A "why me" moment!

I guess it's probably pretty natural this time of year to for a Pastor to ask the question... am I in the right line of work?

Don't get me wrong, I love a good Christmas service just as much as anyone.  In fact it's kind of hard for me not to have a "traditional" Christmas.  And I suppose, if it were just me, I would get over it and just do it.... but it's not.

So today I sit there.  After 4 church services last night (3:45, 5:30, 7:30, and we can't forget 11pm).  And ponder, for my children, if this is what I'm suppose to be doing?  Will they ever have the "traditional" Christmas Eve?  Or do we just have to work really hard at making up our own "traditions"?

And maybe this is a natural wonder... maybe even a healthy wonder.  To always be considering where God is calling me....

And then I can't help but look around.  I can't help but understand that in the midst of a "why me" moment I see Christ.

This week alone their have been a lot of God moments and my family has been a part of it.  And I can't forget those moments either.

I was able to take my kids along with me as we handed out two separate envelopes with $250 cash to people who wouldn't have had a Christmas this year.  As the hugs and the tears came, I hope my children have started to learn the lesson that giving is so much more fun then receiving!

I see Christ in the people that I serve.  In their hugs and warm handshakes.  In their generous gifts and compliments.  In their care for not only my health, but the health of my family.  I see Christ and remember I how blessed I am.

I know everyone has those "why me" moments, and I kind of continue to as I write this blog on Christmas Day in the office of the church.  Waiting for 5-10 people to show up for the 2nd service this morning.  But am also reminded to look around.  To maybe so worrying about myself so much, and see God at work in the world.  And all the blessing that I have been given!

Blessed - but what does it REALLY mean?

I have been attending a text study with local Pastor from many different denominations on Thursday mornings.  I have found it to an important part of my week and fills me as a person.  It's been so much fun to be challenged again and to be with a group of people who care for each other.  It is also fun to really dig deep into the coming weeks texts.  They have been a blessing for me as I continue to transition into life here in Pierre.  


Last week the idea of blessed came up.  In the book of Isaiah, blessed doesn't mean all of the things that God has given us or "blessed" us with, but being "blessed" by God means to be called.  Kind of puts a different twist and makes you really think if you want to be "blessed" by God or not.


I struggle sometimes with being called to be a Pastor.  There are some days were I truly feel blessed and am able to be a part of people's lives in a way that takes my breath away.  Other days I plan out what I could do for a different job.....   Some days being called feels more like a blessing than others!  


But we are all called... in many different ways.  And the things that are the most challenging seem to bring about the biggest joys and satisfaction.  


I have been called to be a mother... and some days being called to be a mother feels more like a blessing than other days.  Last night Eli and Emma were playing so well together and laughing and laughing.  Their giggles were contagious.  It was so much fun watching them make memories together!  Eli has been so funny lately and he has no idea how funny he is.  One night I told him to pull up his pants because I could see his butt crack.  He got mad at me because he insisted that his butt was not cracked!!!  Or.. 2 nights ago he told me that his dad was going to read for the night and he was going to play on the iPad.  I asked him what Emma and I were going to do and he informed me that we would be cleaning the floors.  Eric about fell off his chair laughing.  Eli was then informed that not just girls do housework.  (I apologize in advance to his future wife for not teaching him better!)  


Through it all I am truly blessed... in all my callings.  They might not always be pretty.  I might not always like them.  I might have days when I mess them up or fail, but I have learned.. or maybe am continuing to learn.. that God calls us all to many places to do His work and that God equips us for the journey. 

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